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Sunday 30th November 2008 – Little Rich’s Place
Twas a cold, cold night and the frost, reflecting the uninterrupted starlight, twinkled like gem stones under our feet – and that. No, man, it did! It was really canny out at Little Rich’s farm tonight. Not that Big Rich hung around to enjoy the scene as we decamped the minibus. No, he was that hell bent on maintaining his pole position at the bar – “get that door open Dave” – that his surroundings must have been but a blur. Once inside his relief was palpable as it dawned on him that yes, indeed, he was first at the bar – such dedication to the cause.
While this seemed to be just the usual run of things, a surprise did lay in wait for those of us who are less fleet of foot as, when we entered, we discovered Snow White on the bar! It will, however,come as no surprise to hear that it wasn’t really the fabled associate of a septet of vertically challenged woodsmen but a rather tasty light ale. Our Snow White was 4.2% abv, 26 EBU and flavoured ostensibly using Hallertau hops with some Saaz and Mittlefruh thrown in for the last five minutes of the boil. A good start from Little Rich and, it has to be said, accompanied by the welcome sight of pump clips! Well, I say pump clips, but what I really mean is some pictures printed off by Little Rich’s daughter – still, it’s good to get the bairns involved early because we will all get to the stage when we are too frail to pull our own and............no, that’s just going to sound wrong.
Second up was Little Rich’s Green Wellies and, once we’d done all the jokes about farmers having theirs’ made in a bespoke flared style, we savoured the soft, creamy taste supplied by this 3.5% abv / 25 EBU pale ale. The combination of Progress and Bobeck hops gave this ale a warmer, more lasting, finish than the previous one and, I have to say, I personally downed a second pint before moving onto the next choice. All in the interests of research you know – the pressure to get these reviews right is heavy burden you know!
Just before we got our mouths around the Trucker (I’ll come back this in a minute) a few of us were quite perturbed to notice Big John physically admiring the sleeve of one of the beer engines. To see such a big man exercise such a gentle caress was memorably impressive but, somehow, unsettling particularly when coupled with the wistful distanced gaze in his eyes.................
Anyway, this Trucker I mentioned was, indeed, Little Rich’s third offering of the night and the one that took beer of the night! At 5% abv and 30 EBU this beer seemed straight forward enough but, as befitting a dark ale, it was a beer that held a dark secret. Yes, for beneath its creamy head the essence of Christmas pudding bobbed around to give that promise of the approaching festive season. And how had Little Rich achieved this wintery complexity? Well, he’d slung a Christmas pud into the boil! Oh yes and he was applauded for his cunning; a point at which I need to take issue with the fickleness and contrariness of this group who, only a year after much scoffing and shaking of heads, when myself and Big John did exactly the same thing, can congratulate another group member for having such a brilliant idea – I’ll say nowt else on the matter as the facts do the talking.
So that’s about it for another review, apart from all of the usual kind of necrophilic rantings, double blow backs and talk of slack mashes that abound during our gatherings, but you don’t want to hear about all that – no, you really don’t.
That’s your lot for now, Dave.
Saturday 13th December – The Christmas Do!
Much promise and excitement surrounded the build up for this year’s Christmas do at Pete’s place. There would be the BBC filming and interviewing group members, more pie than you can shake a stick at, and (fanfare of long trumpet things) the final selection of beer of the year. Yes, it’s fair to say it got some of us shaking more than a s!#*ing dog.
And so, as the evening began, and we alighted the minibus in Aldbrough, an air of giddy anticipation abounded - at least that’s what I thought it was. I was informed later that it was probably Jacko’s safety valve doing its evil work! All this excitement was also having an adverse effect on some other members, not least Big Rich. He was so much agog and star struck by the presence of the film crew that he drifted off momentarily. On returning to his senses the horrific realisation hit him that I had bagged the best stool at the bar, a situation to which he responded by spending the rest of the evening trying to push me from my hard won perch by reversing his huge Big Rich backside onto my lap. Still, he seemed to enjoy it and I now have more of an insight into why he keeps a pink cowboy hat on the wall behind his bar.
Meantime, at the bar, Pete had cunningly organised a blind tasting system for the three brews contending for beer of the year and everyone set about the selection process with vigour. On offer were Cascade (Jacko), Skylark (John P) and Freudian Sips (yours truly) – but which was which, I ask you! The tension was excruciating or was that just Big Rich sitting on my knee again. On a more serious note what did transpire during the tastings was just how difficult it is to faithfully replicate a brew and it is fair to say that none of our beers were as good as we remembered. Slight differences in yeast, water temperature, atmospheric conditions, etc are all variables that are hard for us to mediate. The other theory is that we probably have less than reliable memories – can’t think why!
Well it was a close call, at least between Jacko’s and John P’s beers as mine was last by miles, but it was Skylark that emerged victorious and which secured the coveted mini-hand pull trophy. However, events were not without a certain controversy as the winning margin was 5 votes to 4 but Jacko had abstained from voting for his own. Oh, what could have been. We would have had to have a drink off! And yet more controversy abounded when some drunken idiot attempted to spoil John P’s victory interview, with the lovely Emma from Vets in Practice, by shouting something about beginners luck and then the said drunken idiot having a T.V. camera shoved in his face along with accusations of being a bitter loser.
Anyway, it wasn’t long before the BBC lot left and things could get back normal – you know, bitching, back stabbing, moaning..............well it is Christmas. Peace and good will to all men!!
Oh, talking of men, I forgot to mention that some of the WAGs were present this evening and a jolly good time I think they had. Beer, gateaux, the X Factor on the telly and a room full of drunken men – what’s not to enjoy about that. Also forgot to mention that Pete served up his Black Dog Porter as the fourth ale tonight and very good it was too; in fact probably better than all of the other three. But there you go, brewing is a funny game. Here’s looking forward to another year of stiff mashes and good run-offs.
That’s your lot for this year,
Dave
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